me: hey can i have some money?
bank teller: do you have an account with us?
me: nah i just heard yall got money
I STEPPED ON A FUCKING LEAF AND AT THE SAME TIME SOME KID SCREAMED I THOUGHT IT WAS THE FUCKIN LEAF OMG
why do we always have to reblog my mistakes
are we gonna fuckn hold hands tonight or what bitch
i love watching pets sleep bc you see their belly go up and down when they breathe and you’re like wow this is a lil living creature that’s all mine to play with